


Only Us

by Cawerkuu



Series: Fics Based Off Of Songs [6]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Arguing, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Established Relationship, Logan Needs A Hug, M/M, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Doubt, Song Lyrics, Songfic, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-03-07 18:19:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18878653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cawerkuu/pseuds/Cawerkuu
Summary: Patton feels bad after being mean to Logan and goes to apologize. It's placed after and during Moving On 1/2 and 2/2





	Only Us

 

"Ugh! Of course! Thomas?" Logan scoffed, realizing his error in his request to enter Patton's room.

"Uh-huh?" Thomas happily looked at the CD player that held his beloved love for Pink's first album.

"It might not have been the best idea for you to come here," Logan quickly informed Thomas. He hit his head lightly, feeling the shame well up inside him. "Ugh, such a foolish oversight on my part! You are a habitual warrior."

"Yes, I think we established that quite a long time ago, Specs." Roman said, confused by Logan's sudden realization.

"Oh, is that, uh, is that bad for my room?" Patton began to worry, looking around nervously between the two.

"Well, I didn't think Thomas was too different from others but Anxiety almost always has a seat at the table when he makes any decision." Logan informed, pointing towards Virgil. "So, I would say he would worry more than whag is consider the norm."

"Okay, but that still doesn't explain-" Thomas tried but was cut off by Logan.

"I know I told you that nostalgia can cause people to be more optimistic about their future, BUT! For habitual worriers, nostalgia can have an adverse effect on their overall mood. It can sometimes cause them to look at the past compared to the present period in their lives and cause them to ruminate even more on how their present present situation "pales in comparisons" however incorrect that outlook mighy be." Logan said with with hand movements before finally urging them to look at Virgil. "Their Anxiety worsens."

"Virgil, that's not happening, right?" Thomas gave a nervous smile, eyes flickering back from Logan to Virgil.

Virgil hesitated before a demonic voice said, "N-no." But he found himself clasping a hand over his mouth.

"I'm going to take that as a yes." Logan said urgently, hurrying to get everyone to leave before the situation worsen. "Let's go; it's time to end this experiment-"

"Wait wait wait, we can't go now!" Roman cut him off abruptly. "We haven't even started reminiscing about all the Broadway shows he's seen!"

"And all these old photos! Look at this!" Patton awed, flipping through the photos in his hands. Logan felt his heartbeat increase, beginning to find himself anxious as he desperately tried to convince everyone to back out of the room.

It didn't help when Thomas refused as well. "They're right! Logan, we can't leave now; there's still too much to look through!"

"I don't understand this." Logan let out an exasperated sigh. He getting frustrated with them. "What is the worth of making memories if they don't spur you on to create new ones?  I..I am familiar with this...whole ordeal's orgin but it is in the past Thomas, it makes no sense to-"

"Logan, just..." Thomas stopped him, obviously wanting to talk about it and ignore what was wrong. Rather yearning to distract himself than face the problem head on. He grabbed a blue paper book and flipped through the pages quickly. "It's...fine, It's fine."

"But if you would only heed-" Logan tried to reason with Thomas.

"Oh shush, sub-astube teacher!" Roman insulted him as usual, switching through flyers.

And he broke.

"All of this because Patton can't let go of one person?" Logan said, finally snapping with all the frustration and overwhelming insults tipping him over.

"Logan, can you stop?" Patton said angrily, showing his clear in distaste in Logan's attempt to help the situation. Logan studied Patton's face; how his brows were furrowed, eyes torn with pain, and body language stiff and arched in anger. He never wished to ever hurt or upset Patton, he often avoided it at every chance he could. He cared about Patton so he'd never wish to harm him in any way. "Please?"

He was speechless for a moment before the damage to his pride and frustration that had built up before got back to him, "You know what? Fine! If you don't want to listen to me, this is your issue to resolve."

* * *

 

He was hurt. He was deeply hurt. He was always confused by his emotions but he knew this one meant sadness and pain. A terrible tremble of agony rippled through his chest, sitting on his bed in his room with tears trickling down his cheeks from the pain. 

You think as the embodiment of logic and reasoning that he wouldn't get hurt or take Patton's outburst to heart but he couldn't help but let it get to him. It was so illogical, he kept repeating that to himself, 'This is stupid, there is no reason to be hurt by words that hold no true meaning, Patton must regret them-'

"But what if he doesn't?" Deceit, that sly snake, groaned on the bed with his back pressed against rhe wall. He always found in enjoyment in Logan's troubles ever since they met. They had this weird rivalry between them, less humorous and lighthearted than Virgil and Roman had and far more serious. It wasn't as if they despies each other, at least not nessicerly, but rather they were complete opposites expect unlike with Patton, Deceit was far more problematic and destructive.

"Get out of my room," Logan huffed, placing his chin in the palm of his hand. He refused to give in and _cry_ infront of anyone especially him.

"Aw, but I just got here!!" Deceit whined, dragging himself forward to sit next to Logan with a quirky yet confident smile. "Come on, Lo, you can trust me!"

"Trust a liar?" Logan growled, slapping the hand that went to touch him away. He harshly brushed the tears away, willing himself not to cry any further when he stood up. "I think not, I'm perfectly fine. It would be most desirable for you to exit my room this instance."

"Oh, Logan you don't need to _lie."_ Deceit smirked, locking his gaze with a wide-eyed Logan.

"I am fine! It was just a little stupid outburst that won't matter in the future! It's pointless to allow such a small speck of my being get to me so!" Logan snapped, scoffing at Deceit's continious refusal to leave. "I don't have to bicker with you, I must be down there when the others return."

"Oh, how kind of you Logan." Just as the nerd turned around, he heard a condensing tone and slow clapping behind him. "Truly you are the right one, no?"

"What are you-" Logan huffed, looking over to shoulder for Deceit to shock him by grabbing the side by the collar. He stared into those eyes, finding himself speechless at Deceit's glare.

"You're just a textbook, aren't you?" Deceit chuckled lowly, "Just something to inform others of facts, history, and even more boring stuff no one gives a crap about. But you know that don't you? You know how replaceable you are, don't you?"

"I refuse to have this conversation! I am needed-"

"You _want_ them to need you!" Deceit smirked, watching Logan's facade crumble.

"Shut your face!" Logan pushed Deceit away, making the man fall back onto the neatly made bed. Logan huffed, his face flushed red in anger and embarrassment in realization of what had just happened. He played right into his hand, letting him bask in Logan's insecurities with his trick wording! "I am done with this!"

"Sure you are," Deceit smirked, knowing his next remark would kill Logan. "Patton is done with you as well."

He felt his blood boil up as his fists quickly tighten, the knuckles slowly turning white and little crescent marks slowly forming their way into his palms. The anger and displeasure swirled in his eyes and his teeth began to grit against each other. His breath was raggy and sharp, as if he just finish his third lap of a trackfield. He quickly grabbed something off of the hanger in his closet and slammed the door, shuffling down the steps. "You know nothing."

"I know enough." Deceit grinned, relishing in the fact he won and Logan knows it.

* * *

Patton sighed, rising back up into his usual spot infront of the white blinds. He felt much better after talking to everyone, realizing how everyone felt and how it wasn't just affecting him only. Sure, he may never forget about Thomas's first love but he doesn't have to and the memories were good, at least Thomas and the others think so. He knows it can never be again but that's okay because like Logan said before, _"If you've previously experienced stretches of time during which you've felt fulfillment and happiness, then the idea that you could experience something similar in the future is not inconceivable."_

Logan. Oh, god. He hurt Logan! Just as as he began to worry about the poor loveable nerd, he heard him speak. "Oh, you're back."

"Hey..." Thomas anxiously turned to him, seeming very hesitant.

"Ah, hey...buddy." Roman said awkwardly, waving a little.

"Logan!" Patton smiled onsight of the man, almost forgetting how he hurt the man before him.

"Finally come to your senses, I see." Logan tried to play it off with a smirk. The truth was he was actually deeply hurting down beneath his mask, worse than before thanks to a certain deceitful side.

"Um, sorry...Logan." Patton said hesitantly, he felt horrible for hurting Logan even if the logical side wouldn't dare show it. "I don't know why these things make us lose sight of you sometimes."

"And- uh- a little compromise Patton?" Logan had grabbed the hoodie he had been planning on giving Patton for Christmas but decided it was perhaps best for now as an apology gift. "As much as it may pain me, sometimes when the heart wants a change, you must listen to it. Is this appealling to you...at all?"

Patton gasped happily, a grin spreading across his cheeks. Logan took that as a good sign. "Logan...is that a...cat hoodie?"

"I thought this might be a little less cumbersome while still catering to your, uh, eccentric standards." Logan said, nervously.

"You me got me a GIFT?" Patton happily caught it, bring it close to his face. "Oh my goodness, I love it!!"

"It even has a front pouch to place an actual cat, if you so desire." Logan nudged his glasses up a little.

"Oh, I can't! I'm allergic." Patton said casually, as if it was common knowledge.

"Then WHY the cat onesie?" Logan quickly got in the mood of their usual humorous bickering.

"I like cats!" Patton giggled innocently.

And with that, Logan felt a little more content even if Deceit's remarks were digging at the back of his mind.

* * *

Even though Patton had apologized, he felt absoutely horrible. The ache to apologize privately was eating at him so much that be found himself subconsciously at Logan's door. He hurt Logan, someone he deeply cared about.

He hurt his boyfriend and that in itself is a crime in Patton's eyes. He reached up and hesitantly knocked on the door, hearing, "Come in," from the other side of the wooden door. He took a deep breathe and tried to remain calm as best as he could, he needed to patch things up firmly with Logan. He creaked the door open and slipped into the ever orgazined and neat room as always. He found his sweet boyfriend at his desk infront of his computer, probably researching something. "Um, Logan?"

"Yes?"

Patton sighed, "Lo, come over here and sit on the bed with me. We need to talk."

Logan was a rational person. For Pete's sake, he was Thomas's logic! So that's why he found himself contradicting his very being once more when he started to think Patton wanted to break up because of his outburst earlier. He took a deep breath, trying not to show his concern through his mask and walked over to sit next to Patton on his bed.

'Don't overthink this, Logan.' He reminded himself, looking back at his boyfriend.

"I'm..." Patton hesitiated, he knew Logan was hurting. He just knew it. Much as Logan wished he waa just logic with no emotions whatsoever, that wasn't the case and his emotionlessness was just a facade for his own protection. He was very fragile and delicate when it came to some things and Patton knew that. He told Patton that when he asked him out, about the dangers and problematic behaviors he has. "I'm sorry! I shouldn't have been so mean to you! It wasn't your fault, I swear. I was a horrible boyfriend and I get it if you feek like I don't deserve-"

"Patton," Logan gaped, not expecting an endless spur of apologizes falling from Patton's lip.

"I shouldn't have blocked you out like that and let this build up. I should have went to you and the others and talked it out. I know that now and I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry." Patton choked on his sobs, tears welling in his eyes. He hated the idea of the nerd, of his nerd, in pain because of his selfishness.

"Patton." Logan tried again.

"But I swear I'll telk you when I'm not up for it or something is wrong. I swear! I know I hurt you and I'm so sorry, I'll do everything I can to make sure I never do again." Patton clasped his hands over Logan's, squeezing them for dear life. He locked eyes with Logan who could see his lover's eyes becoming glossy from the overwhelming wetness. "Please, I'll never hurt you but I won't make you stay with me if-"

"Patton!" Logan finally snapped, wanting Patton to let him speak.

"!" Patton's mouth snapped shut at that, looking down at their hands.

"I don't need you to sell me on reasons to want you," Logan softly said, smiling down at the same place as Patton. He knew his boyfriend didn't mean anything now and he wasn't mad at Logan either. He was so grateful Patton loved him but now Patton needed reassurance and Lofan planned to give him all he needed, "I don't need you to search for the proof that I should because what we've got going is good."

"But I-" He was hushed with a quick peck from Logan which he quickly relished in before it was ripped away from him unfairly, might he add.

 _"I don't need more reminders of all that's been broken. I don't need you to fix what I'd rather forget."_ Logan sighed, reaching up to caress Patton's jawline with the pad of his thumb. They were both clearly hurt by this and they needed each other to fix this roadblock of theirs. _"Clear the slate and start over."_

"Okay." Patton said in the quietest voices, causing a sigh from Logan knowing what that meant.

 _"Try to quiet the noises in your head. We can't compete with all that."_ Logan reminded him, slowly bringing Patton into his embrace. _"So what if it's us? What if it's us? And only us?"_

 _"And what came before won't count anymore or matter?"_ Patton giggled, loving the song Logan had been referencing the whole time but knowing he meant truth to thise pharses.

 _"Can we try that?"_ Logan gently whispered. _"What if it's you? And what if it's me? And what if that's all that we need it to be?"_

Truly that's all Patton would yearn for. He loved being by Logan's side, seeing how beautiful and bright the side's mind was. He loved kissing, touching, and whispering sweet words to Logan whenever the man began to overworm himself or became too stressed to care about his own selfbeing. He just loved all of Logan and nothing could convince Logan didn't love him because Logan showed it in his own little ways. With the way he learned Patton's schedule so they could plan things and learned the small things like how Patton likes his coffee made or how he likes his pasta cooked. _"And the rest of the world falls away? What do you say?"_

"I'd say yes over and over, darling." Logan gently wove his fingers in Patton's curls. He smiled sweetly down at the soft man. He always found himself to be protective over the literal embodiment of sunshine (as Virgil always put it), worrying over him constantly and checking up on him when he got extra worried. He loves Patton with all his heart so he couldn't bear him to be harmed when it is preventable.

"I'm sorry." Logan said.

"I'm sorry too." Patton smiled, squeezing Logan letting him know everything was alright.

And it was. They would be alright. They could work through this together.


End file.
